Cubicle Conundrum - Day 57

Q: I can't believe you're talking to Low Self-Esteem Guy.

N: Hey, he's here. Might as well use him.

Q: That's just wrong, N. You can't treat a human being like that.

N: (yawns)

Q: I think it's best if you stopped this before it gets out of control.

N: Let it go on for a little while. I'll stop later.

Q: I’m just saying that it’s not the right thing to do. You shouldn’t use him to build up your own sense of self-worth.

N: (Gesturing to Low Self-Esteem Guy as he walks past) Hey, I'd like you to meet Q. The one I told you about.

Q: (Reluctant polite grin)

Low Self-Esteem Guy: Q! Wow. You really seem like such an intelligent person from what N tells me. Your sense of morals and ethics coupled with your dedication to your job is something I can only aspire to remotely come close to some day. I’m positively ecstatic to finally have the chance to meet you! Oh what a wonderful day this is!



(Low Self-Esteem Guy leaves)



Q: ....

N: ....



Q: Well maybe we can talk to him for just a little while longer.

N: ‘We’?

Cubicle Conundrum - Day 56

N: Wow. Who’s that over there by the coffee machine?

Q: (Looks) You don’t know her? That’s B. She’s been threatening to quit for the last 3 years.

N: B. Hmm.



Q: She looks great, huh?

N: Great? She looks FANTASTIC!

Q: (nods and stares, grinning devilishly)

N: (nods and stares, grinning devilishly)



Q: ….

N: ….


Q: Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

N: (Nodding and grinning) Definitely!



Q and N together: Someone will get promoted when she leaves!

Cubicle Conundrum - Day 55

Q: This is ridiculous.

N: What is?

Q: My team is meeting for the third time this week for a review on a module which has already been reviewed.



N: Maybe you guys changed it a bit.

Q: No. It’s all the same. Nobody changed anything. Last time it was with my boss’ boss’ boss. The time before that was with my boss’ boss.

N: Oh. And this time?

Q: This time they’re sitting together.



N: Wow. That is ridiculous.

Q: And we’re having yet another review next week.



N: (chuckling)Why? Is someone going to bring a pet along that hasn’t seen the demo yet?



Q: ….

N: ….

Q: ….



N: Wow.

Cubicle Conundrum - Day 54

N: I’m done! I’m actually done!

Q: Huh? What?

N: My work! I’m done for the day! I’m about to leave at Five ‘o Clock for the first time in months!!

Q: Well congratulations.



N: Thanks! Boy, this is going to be so good. I have the whole evening to myself. I can do everything I wanted to do but never had the chance!

Q: That’s awesome, N. Good for you.

N: Thanks! Well, see you tomorrow. I’m off to enjoy the rest of this evening; paint the town red; live my life again.

Q: Great. Bye.



N: ….

Q: ….

N: ….



Q: You’re going to go home, change into a sweatshirt, watch TV all night while you order Chinese food and try to recollect the exact moment that you lost any semblance of a social life, aren’t you?



N: ….

Q: ….



N: Maybe I can stay and help you out instead.

Cubicle Conundrum - Day 53

Q: Guess what? My neighbor thinks somebody is performing voodoo on his dog.

N: His dog? Voodoo?

Q: Yes and yes.

N: Isn’t voodoo about performing some kind of black magic using a doll and some personal belonging of the target?

Q: That’s the one.

N: That’s ridiculous. On a dog, even! (laughing)



Q: I know. He wouldn’t listen to me. In fact he suggested I try using voodoo on people that annoy me. (laughing)

N: Oh that is funny! As if that mumbo-jumbo even exists!(laughing)

Q: (laughing)

N: (laughing)



Q: ….

N: ….

Q: ….



N: I haven’t left any stuff of mine at your place have I?

Cubicle Conundrum - Day 52

N: What are you doing?

Q: Finalizing my leave application. I’m taking a vacation after all.

N: Vacation? Nice.

Q: Yeah. One week.



N: A whole week? That’s nice.

Q: Yeah.

N: No emails, no phone calls..

Q: Yeah.

N: No programming, no testing..

Q: Yeah.

N: No deadlines..

Q: Yeah.



N: The piling up of pending tasks..

Q: ….

N: The inevitable squeezing in of a number of overlapping deadlines once you’re back..

Q: ….

N: Not to mention the amount of catching up to do on the project’s progress..

Q: ….

N: A hundred mails to sift through..

Q: Okay stop.

N: None of which will get the appropriate amount of attention from you..

Q: Enough.

N: You might delete the wrong one in a hurry which informs you of a deadline you missed..

Q: Ugh.

N: Or a review that went badly..

Q: Gah!!! Enough!! Shut up!



(a few minutes pass)



N: What are you doing?

Q: Cancelling. Vacations are too much stress.

Cubicle Conundrum - Day 51

N: Do you notice how people from one career often identify themselves with people of another similar career?

Q: Hmm. What do you mean?

N: Well a security guard might identify himself with a cop. A dentist might identify with a neurosurgeon.

Q: Yeah I guess you’re right.



N: So who do you think will identify with us?

Q: Interesting question.

N: Yeah.

Q: Let’s see..



N: ….

Q: ….

N: ….

Q: ….



N: (sigh)

Q: (sigh)



N: I don’t blame them.

Q: Neither do I.